We blew it. Our argument counter has to start over. We had, oh, about a 5-hour argument over something ridiculous.
Get this.... it lasted through two visits to a coffee shop (we had to get up once to walk around the block), and a trip to the gym.
The good news here (and something we haven't mentioned before) is that whenever we have an argument, we come to a joint conclusion about what it's about before walking away from it. If it's totally meaningless, we both name it as such and move on. If there's a nugget of something new to be learned, we acknowledge that and move on.
After such a long argument, it took a lot of willpower to not make it for nothing. We challenged ourselves to send it off into the past in the right way – with a joint assessment of what it was, and an agreement regarding what we'll (try) to do different next time.
As we've said before, our relationship is incredibly solid – we don't argue about things that put our marriage on shaky ground. And, we've also said that we believe that an occasional argument is actually a really good thing. Even so – and even though we have to start our counter over – we're proud of ourselves for not arguing for nothing.
No matter how small, an argument provides an opportunity to learn and grow.